Preventing a car accident is easy:
Be sure to wipe your hands on your jeans
before touching the steering wheel.
Set the radio’s volume to an even number.
Turn on the CD player and keep
on repeat while on the bridge or interstate.
Count to ten.
(Repeat when necessary).
Keep gum in the cup holder for good luck
but don’t touch it until you’re safe at home again.
-None of this makes sense.
-No. But it’s been working. So just in case….