Tag Archives: anxiety

Social Anxiety (part III)

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Thank you for the invitation.

But I must be leaving early.

They noticed the cracks

in my head the second I entered

the room. And you can do better

than a burden.

Better on Paper.

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Thoughts before I speak

are hands rearranging letters on the Scrabble

board until it finds coherence.

I open my mouth and all that spills is

static, voices under water,

an awkward pose,

unkempt hair and dirt under my fingernails.

But sometimes it lands on paper,

in high definition.

Clear,

as if you’re reading through a picture window

or most likely,  someone else.

Obsessive Compulsive (Revisions)

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Preventing a car accident is easy:

 

Be sure to wipe your hands on your jeans

before touching the steering wheel.

Set the radio’s volume to an even number.

Turn on the CD player. Keep

“Hell’s Bells”

on repeat while on the bridge or interstate.

Count to ten.

(Repeat when necessary).

Keep gum in the cup holder for good luck

good behavior,

good outcome,

but don’t touch it until you’re safe at home again.

 

-None of this makes sense.

-No. But it’s been working. So just in case….

A Little Obsessive Compulsive (Revised)

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Preventing a car accident is easy:

 

Be sure to wipe your hands on your jeans

before touching the steering wheel.

Set the radio’s volume to an even number.

Turn on the CD player and keep

“Hell’s Bells”

on repeat while on the bridge or interstate.

Count to ten.

(Repeat when necessary).

Keep gum in the cup holder for good luck

good behavior,

good outcome,

but don’t touch it until you’re safe at home again.

 

-None of this makes sense.

-No. But it’s been working. So just in case….

Well

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I think about how easy it would be to stop trying,

throw the orange vial in a junk drawer and forget

about keeping a job,

getting a master’s

waking up to clean the house

comb my hair,

make eye contact

and speak “well” with a stranger.

 

It was easy until I met you. It’s getting harder

to disappoint when you’re watching.